Ava Noelle: The birth story

I have been slowly writing out my birth story for Ava.  I have a lot of great memories and attachment to this labor and process so I have struggled to figure out what I wanted to put down and felt ok with sharing.  A couple disclaimers for those reading this:  I am admittedly excited and proud that I was able to experience a successful VBAC.  I did not go into this pregnancy planning a VBAC.  I actually thought I would choose a repeat C-section.  The decision came after talking to my midwife multiple times about current research and the best decision for me and this baby as well as talking to several friends about their experience.  I also know that a large percentage of women who try for a VBAC may not be able to have one.  I actually was given a statistic along the way that my chances were around 66% positive.  There are so many factors that go into the success of this story but I was fully prepared that she may also be born via C-section like Ariy and that would be ok too.  We were just so excited to meet this baby girl of ours that the success of the VBAC was the icing on top of a pretty great cake.  Lastly, I also chose to have an umedicated birth for so many reasons including that it can increase your chance for a successful VBAC.  I will admittedly say that I think a labor with an epidural would be awesome but for me and my specific goals, I wanted to labor naturally.

Most of this story is documented in the video on Rick's blog that we made shortly after Ava Noelle's birth.  One of the best gifts from our awesome Doula Corie was a written timeline of the day.  She helped bring a little clarity to the fogginess you naturally have after labor.  

Friday, January 11th - Induction Day


7:30 am - We all arrive at the hospital. I am 40 weeks +5 days.

My good friend Lara was with Rick and I for the big day.  We were also meeting our Doula there as well.  All week I had been having on again off again contractions but every night they would disappear when I went to sleep. I was hopeful that I was far enough progressed that things would move quickly after they broke my water.


On Monday of this week I had also gone in to meet the midwife who would do this induction.  On that day she stripped my membranes and I was almost 5 cm and about 80% effaced.  The rest of the week I spent doing all kinds of things to get labor going like walking, acupuncture, tea, etc.  Finally, Friday came and we proceeded with getting my water broken (no turning around at this point).


9:00 am – membranes ruptured, 5cm, 90% effaced, -2 station, posterior cervix, baby’s head a bit transverse


The midwife came in as soon as we got there and discussed our plan to break my water and try for a VBAC.  She was hopeful but also continued to caution us that with a VBAC they will watch me close and and to keep our expectations realistic.  This just made me even more determined to have this be a successful VBAC.  When she checked me I was 5 cm dilated, 90% effaced, and the water bag was in a position that she could break so we went ahead and broke it at 9am.

9:10 am Walking commenced 

This is what I would call part 1 or scene 1 of my labor.  It may not have seemed like 2 parts for everyone else but it felt like two distinct parts for me.  The first half I will call the 5K.  Lara and I learned that the loop around the labor and delivery floor was 1/8th of a mile.  When we started walking we decided to do 1 mile (8 laps).  Things were not picking up a whole lot after the first mile so we decided we might as well walk 2 more.  For such a large labor and delivery unit, I was shocked we were the only ones walking/running around the floor.  We even got heckled by one nurses station for being the monitor that kept going off.  As we walked by them, Lara overheard one of the nurses saying "is that 223 again?"  Lara piped up as we strolled by "oh that room 223, they are terrible."  Every time we made a lap, the monitors I had to wear went out of range and started beeping at the nurses station so fortunately for them, they got to listen 24 times during our 5K.

10:25 – contractions start to pick up in strength and consistency

The first half of the labor was what I would call easy.  I was able to talk and laugh through them.  We were making jokes, doing hula dances and bouncing on the ball.  At some point between 11 and 12 I believe, things changes.  I remember a sense that things were taking a turn a verbalized it to everyone in our room.  I believe I said, "I think we are going to need to switch gears here."  From this point on, there was no more talking during contractions.  Most of this time was spent next to my bed or on the ball.  The other turning point was a little scary for me.  I believe I was standing next to my bed and all of a sudden I got a wave of light-headedness.  Others said I went pretty pale.  I remember feeling a bit scared at this moment but the feeling went away shortly after.  I definitely had the strong sense at this point that there is no turning back (duh!).

12:25 – contractions 2-3 min apart and I am having to focus and breath

12:30 – into shower while tub is prepared and in tub shortly after

My plan all along was to use the tub as pain relief.  I labored in the tub with Ariy for the majority of the time and it was how I got through.  I really wanted to wait this time until the point that I knew it would feel great getting in the tub.  At this point, contractions were getting close together and growing in intensity.  In my mind, this was only the beginning of hard labor so the tub would be were I would hang out for the next few hours (not the case).  I couldn't wait for the tub to be filled so we jumped in the shower (or waddled) for maybe 2 or 3 contractions.  By then, the tub was filled and we made a quick getaway across the hall to the room with the tub.  I will say, Ariy's tub was awesome - large jacuzzi type tub.  This was just your average tub; nothing special.

12:50 – urge to push in tub, grunting noises, I panicked thinking “She’s coming out!”

I was in the tub for no more than 15 minutes before we had to head back to the room.  Shortly after being in the tub, I started to feel the baby come down.  This is a turning point for me.  Ariy never budged.  He never descended down the birth canal.  I still had a very strong urge to push with him but after 2 hours of pushing and many different positions, he still had not moved.  Ava on the other hand, just started coming down on her own.  This was totally new for me.  I wasn't consciously pushing but my body was doing it for me and in turn, I thought she was coming right out of me.  At one point in the tub I believe I said "I think she is coming out of my butthole."  I realize that is impossible but that is what it felt like.

At this point, my Doula headed back to the room to grab the nurse (just 10 minutes after me getting in the tub).  The nurse didn't really believe her that I was pushing but once the nurse came in and got a look at me and heard me (apparently you can tell a lot by the sounds of a laboring woman - weird!) she knew it might be that time.

Before heading back over to the room, the nurse wanted to check me so they made me turn over in the tub which was the worst possible experience at that moment.  I couldn't fathom how I was going to turn over on my own and shouted for help.  Lara, being so brave, apparently jumped in the tub to help me turn over.  I don't even remember this but leggings and all, she was in with me.  The nurse checked and very quickly said, "Yep, there's the head.  Let's get back into the room."

1:00(approximately) – back to room to start pushing, contractions intense, baby right there!

Pushing. I pushed for about 45 minutes.  I used the mirror which was actually awesome.  I don't know if I originally asked for it but I was open to it and it really helped to be able to see the progress we were making.  After getting back into the room, it was only a couple pushes until we could see her head continuously.  Pushing was hard.  It is such a mind game.  As contractions came on, all I wanted to do was jump out of my body and run away but if I could psych myself up and get into it and push with my body, it was so satisfying to feel and see her move down.   

1:49pm – Baby girl born! 

With some good help from the midwife who apparently was anything but gentle, Ava was born at 1:49pm just under 5 hours after having my water broke.  I had a very small tear but nothing bad which I was thankful for; that was something I was really nervous about.  My favorite part of her birth was the sound of the room when she came out.  Pretty much everyone let out a hooray!  There was a lot of people in the room rooting for this birth to happen like it did and we all celebrated afterwards.  Apparently, everyone shed a few tears.  I think I was in shock for a good while after the whole experience   It was so drastically different from my labor with Ariy and for that I "loved" every moment of it.  Yes, it was the hardest thing I have ever done.  Yes, it was painful and a bit crazy.  It was totally worth it.

2:15 – Apgar of 9 and 9, baby crying, eyes wide open, intact placenta, baby had chubby cheeks, good color and lots of hair.  Everyone cleaned up and happy!

Thank you to Corie for being a great Doula.  I believe that part of my success in all this was having the constant support I had from Corie.  She was excited and confident in this VBAC and also was willing and wanting to journey through the up's and down's of this pregnancy with me.  She helped me to go into this birth with a lot more confidence then I would of had without her.  I think this was crucial to such a positive outcome.

Thank you to Lara (Capuano).  Her friendship is very special to me.  We have always been close even though our relationship has pretty much been long distance for the majority of it's time.  We have been able to experience the big milestones in each others lives but this was the first birth either of us had been there for.  She was an amazing support to me during labor.  I did a lot of nuzzling into her neck and shoulder even though I said I was not sure I would want to be touched (so much for that).  She also took great care of Ariy and helped Rick and I transition back to home post-hospital.  We wouldn't of wanted it any other way Lara. Thanks sacrificing your time, money and energy to come all the way out to Portland for this special time.

A BIG thank you to my husband.  Rick has been pretty amazing through this whole process.  I have had some major anxiety about having two kiddos.  He has made it a lot more doable and has been a pretty awesome daddy to Ariy and Ava.  Rick would not say that labor is something he enjoys, he would not sign up for that again.  He was always right there though and ready to do whatever was needed.  After Ava was born, you could see the love he had for her instantly.  I sometimes like to think I am or could be super women and do it all on my own if need be but there is not way I could of had the outcome I did with Ava's birth and a relatively smooth transition home without the support I have been receiving from Rick.  Thank you for being a great daddy and husband.  You are loved.

LOTS of other people were important to this story including many friends and family members.  Thank you all for your generosity and support.  We couldn't do it without family and community.

The play by play.

Yesterday was project "natural induction day."  I went in to have the "sweep" in the morning with the midwife.  Later that day I went for my second session of acupuncture.  I drank a few cups of red raspberry leaf tea and I spent some time walking the mall in the evening.  It all led to some pretty strong contractions later that evening but as usually once I go to bed they all pretty much go away.  The next few days we wait.  If Friday morning rolls around, we go in at 7:30am to have my water broken.  I am already at a 5 or so and ready to go says the midwife so this should go quick.

If you are actually following this saga, keep your eyes peeled on Rick's blog for the official announcement.  He will probably put one up fairly soon after we have her.  His blog can be found here.

A few random pics from this past Sunday.  Football Sunday of course.  I am experimenting with a new camera so not great shots quality but...

40 weeks today! This is the week...

I am pretty sure today will come and go without a baby but I have felt pretty prepared for this to happen.  I also have a lot to look forward to this week which definitely includes meeting our baby girl; either way there is an end to this part of the journey and I am looking forward to it.

So here is the update.  As of Friday I am pretty much a 4 dilated, 70-80% effaced and just ready to go.   I haven't experienced much change over the past couple weeks and my midwife believes I am just really close and ready to go and not much will change until active labor starts.

The plan is this - we try some more gentle natural ways to get things going.  I did my first acupuncture session yesterday.  It was actually pretty great.  In all I was there for 2 hours - way longer than I expected; I think I might of fallen asleep.  There are two spots on your hands and ankles that are suppose to help get things going and I believe release oxytocin in your body.  They put a few needles in other places but the sets in those particular spots, they hooked up to a little electrode thing that I could control and increase a current as I felt comfortable.  It was really interesting and I mostly just tried to relax and let it do it's thing.  I have felt a lot stronger contractions since and just a whole lot of pressure.  Sometimes this works the first time around but many people do a couple sessions but there are numerous studies from eastern and western countries to show that acupuncture is a very effective way to induce labor.  I may do another session tomorrow afternoon after my meeting with the midwife.

I also have been drinking  a lot of red raspberry leaf tea which is suppose to do something with the uterus.

Tomorrow morning I go in to have my membranes swept.  I really feel a tad uncomfortable saying that.  Again, for some this is enough to get things moving along.

The final and last resort will be going in on Friday to have my water broke as a means of inducing.  My body is already ready to go and this is how I was induced the first time so there is a strong likelihood that this should work.  The risk obviously is there is no turning back.  Once we break my water and must have her in some way shape or form.

Here are a couple pics of me at 40 weeks!  This has been a much different pregnancy and I think I look a lot different this time around.  I am so curious to see how big she is when we meet her this week.

39.5 weeks with Ariy

 

My life in blog titles...

The last 24 hours or so I have had a number of blog titles floating through my mind based on the many many things that are going on, have already gone on or will be going on real soon.

Am I ready for this?
I am terrified. Seriously.
Sick kids suck - but I still love them.
This is temporary.
Ok baby girl, you can come (I think).

Mostly, the last month or so of our life has been a bit stressful to say the least.  Rick and I are both by nature pretty laid back and I think for the most part that makes things work.  We can make it through hard moments or learn to live on barely any income.  We just do it.  I think what's wrong with types like us is that there is always emotion and processing that needs to happen, we just either ignore it, write it off as no big deal and let it boil up, or attempt to process minimally.

My due date is Sunday and I am hoping for a VBAC.  That means I have a timeline.  The practice I work with is amazing but they really don't want me going past 41 weeks so at 41 weeks and 1 day I have a scheduled C-section in the books.  I have hoped and mildly prayed that I would get to experience spontaneous labor and meet this timeline but as it nears I get nervous.

On the flip side, I have realized that I have been pretty content putting off having this baby.  I mean I think it is ridiculous I was on bedrest for possible pre-term labor for 3 months and now I am looking at being "over-due."  I am more than uncomfortable and physically ready to be done with pregnancy and probably done with it for good.  And, I am excited to meet this little baby girl.  However, every night that I make it through the night contraction free I wake up a little relieved.  I still spend plenty of wasteful minutes throughout the day looking up signs of labor and reading into every uncomfortable feeling I have but I simultaneously am ok with the fact that I am not yet fully responsible for 2 kiddos under the age of 2 living and breathing here in the outside world.  It just sounds overwhelming.  I have had more than one friend tell me how hard it was for them to go from 1 to 2 and I just can't shake their experience.  Perhaps, the stress is based on our current financial situation.  I am super blessed to have a smart and money-wise husband so when things are tight (and real real tight) we can make it pretty ok and really have nothing to worry (or complain) about.  Perhaps it's having a sick kid whom we had to take to urgent care at 1am the other night; our first middle of the night trip only to be diagnosed with something that looked like strep and possible pneumonia.  There are lots of moments I don't feel cut out for this and the last couple days have felt like that.  Last night I realized every time I woke up listening to my son cry out in his sleep "mama mama" because he feels so awful I was also happy to not have another baby laying in the pack n play next to me.  Cue the guilt/epiphany.

I do want this baby girl - so bad.  I just am realizing I can't do this alone and some days are going to suck real bad and some days are going to be really hard.  I am praying hard not that the timing works out perfect; that Ariy is perfectly healthy and happy when I go into labor and our house is spotless and completely disinfected (this was my prayer yesterday).  Today I am praying for strength and anticipation   No matter when she comes I will be ready because I am surrounded by people that love and care for me and my family; friends and family both near and far have been amazingly supportive.  It may be hard but she is going to be a major blessing to this family.  We are blessed already that the outcome is as positive as it is despite some initial scares.  I just can't wait to see her face.  Bring on labor.

This is a picture posted by my friend Lara.  The question (what will God do if...) and answers (God will...) were a great reminder to me as I face this new adventure.