Ava Noelle: 6 Month Update

I can't believe our little lady is 6 months old.  Time is flying by and as much as I hate that, I love seeing this little one grow!  She has brought pure joy with her.  She is our little firecracker and just loves to smile and play and be in on any and all action going on.  Things to remember:

• Ava is the poster child for "averages."  (on July 22) You are 16 lbs 8 oz and 26.5 inches long.  You fit exactly in 6 month clothing.  Right on track.  I believe your head size is also average.
• You are our little owl eyed baby.  Many people comment on your eyes.  You pretty much always look stunned and wide eyed.  We love it because we love your pretty blue eyes.
• You love your paci.  You have figured out how to put it back in which is great for sleep time; you can do it on your own!
• On that note, you just recently started sleeping through the night which everyone is excited about!!  You aren't perfect by no means and you don't sleep in late like your brother but in generally we are thankful for the nice long stretch!
• You have been sitting up great for a while now.  You generally prefer to sit up now to play and often get mad when you fall over.
• You are getting close to crawling.  You can push up on all fours once and a while but you manage to spin and shimmy any direction you want.  A new round of baby proofing is on the horizon.
• You are starting to get mad when people take things away from you.  You have a tight grip but when we take it away it is often a loud yell and cry.
• You generally take 3 naps but that often turns into 2 naps and 2 cat naps because we like to get out a lot in the nice weather and go to parks or friends houses.  You love being outside. So far you have most enjoyed the sand at Discovery park in McMinnville. 
• You want everything your brother has. Its's already starting.  You have your own "buddy" the giraffe because you often want to steal your brothers.
• We mostly are doing baby led weaning in terms of food (fancy name for solid foods from the start instead of purely purees).  The purees I have tried so far didn't go over well and you just seem to like to play and munch on actual food so that's what we are doing. You have had broccoli, avocado, carrots, sweet potatoes, squash and zucchini, banana, pear and plain yogurt. 
• Your hair is without a doubt red and continues to grow especially on the top and front.  We love it!
• Although we contemplating changing your name (gasp!) before the 6 month mark we decided not to.  We love your pretty name that fits such a pretty little lady.  We love you Ava Noelle!

Ariy Update

Somewhere along the motherhood "lines" regular updates become not so regular.  This is my best form of documenting the kiddos lives although I am trying to create some type of baby book for each of them but I wouldn't say it's my gifting.

What to say about Ariy these days???

He turned two on April 20th and has fully embraced the role of toddler.  I really love this age.  He is soaking in so much, learning on a daily basis, saying new words and sentences constantly and makes us laugh.  Things to remember for this age:

• "...a little bit."  I often say, "let's let it cool down a little bit" in referring to his food.  This ending has now become one of his favorite things to say.  "Go upstairs a little bit?"  "A walk a little bit?"  "Nap a little bit."  Really anything.
• Tools, tools and more tools (and lawnmowers too).  He is pretty much obsessed with Rick and especially watching him fix things.  Without a doubt, if you were to hang out with Ariy today he would talk about his Daddy fixing something or his daddy mowing the grass.  Both are his two favorite things to do along side his Dad.
• He is "all boy."  I really like to think that all the gender stereotypes are just stereotypes but whether are culture has cemented them into specific "roles" or not, it is pretty obvious that boys and girls are created a bit differently.  Most all of Ariy's closest friends are girls his age and I am getting to the point that I feel myself apologizing a lot.  He seems to be a bit more destructive kind of like a tornado but I also find his communication and discipline seem to be simpler.  I find the girls seem to understand a conversation and how to "talk through things" much earlier.  Ariy just does, destructs, creates, fixes and moves.  I love it all though.
• He is mostly dairy free.  He has always struggled with coughs and something called restrictive airway, similar to asthma and uses an inhaler on an as needed basis.  Well, after months straight of daily and nightly coughing and two bouts of croup, multiple steroid treatments we found ourselves we no answers.  We asked two different  doctors if he will ever stop coughing (he was waking up every single night coughing for 3 months straight - no exaggeration) and their answers were not actual answers.  One said he will most likely cough for the rest of his life "some people just cough."  Really?!  The other said all children have a "thing" they struggle with and his is a cough.  I started to do my own research on the internet and through some books I trust as well as some friends.  I landed on dairy as the most plausible culprit.  We tried taking him off an within 2 or 3 weeks the coughing stopped.  All in all it has been a very good and healthy decision for him.
• Other loves: parks, playing with friends, lawnmowers "cutting the grass", vegan mac and cheese, rubbing "baby sissy's" head, blankets, tools, keys and playing in cars, music, "I will wait" by Mumford and Sons is played at least once a day here, jumping at gymnastics, raisins, all breakfast foods (this morning's bfast consisted of 2 mini egg quiches with vegis and fake cheese (we call them egg muffins and 1 entire bowl of oatmeal), trains; Newberg constantly has trains going through it and we can hear them so some days we try and chase them down to see them.  The other day one stopped as it was going through the middle of town and Ariy got to touch it (big moment). He also loves to play his guitar, sing songs and play the drums.

He is also really into taking a good "selfie"

A spoon and some PB often serve as a nice treat

Big win with the $5 Grocery Outlet battery operated tootbrush

One of his best buds char

His favorite CSA find; fresh strawberries

3 Month old Ava Noelle

Ava will be 4 months on May 11th.  I am definitely not as good at recording milestones about her and pictures as well.  I hope to get back on the bandwagon but we will see...

3 months means

• She is starting to roll over.  Not consistent but she has rolled over from belly to back a few times and back to side.
• Trying to sit up.  It's funny to see this.  Sometimes she tries to sit up from her car seat or swing.  Time to make sure we are buckling her in.
• Talking/Cooing/laughing.  She does this a lot more than Ariy did so I wonder what that means.  She also is laughing a little especially if we tickle her neck.
• Mostly consistent long sleeping stretches.  Ariy took to sleeping like a champ.  He still is a great sleeper and sleeps a lot.  Ava may be a bit different we anticipate.  She pretty regularly will go to bed between 7 and 8 and sleep until 2 or 3.  
• Big eyes.  We get a lot of comments on how aware she is.  She pretty much is sleeping or wide eyed. Her hair is also growing in a pretty bright tone of red and with her mostly full head of hair we also get a fair amount of head rubbing from strangers.  I never had that happen with Ariy but strangers love to just get a rub of her head.  Cute I guess?
• During the day she eats every 2 to 4 hours.  
• She wears 3 month clothes and was around 12 lbs at 3 months

WIDE eyes

Check out my chubby cheeks and chin

I love me some pacifier

Ava Noelle is 4 weeks and a bit of life lately

I can't believe Ava is already 4 weeks old.  We all have felt right at home with her including Ariy.  He loves his sister and has yet to really act out.  I feel pretty blessed that he has transitioned so well so far.

Life with Ava so far...

• We are all just in love with this little one.  She was welcomed with so much excitement and love and joy that it has been hard to be frustrated with the fussy times and sleepless nights
• Besides normal newborn fussyness, she is pretty content at least compared to Ariy.  By this age, Ariy was already on medicine for reflux.  By 3 weeks old he was obviously in pain after eating and often inconsolable.  She is happy to be held most of the time and very content after eating although she does spit up a lot.
• She is awake and aware!! Ariy was a sleeper from the start.  I felt like we didn't really hang out with him much until around 6 months.  He still sleeps a ton (yes, we are thankful).  This one though - she already loves to look around and is awake for a lot longer stretches then Ariy ever was as a newborn.
• She has started smiling with a big open mouth grin and squinty eyes.  So fun, can't wait for it to be more consistent.
• She is tiny (at least compared to Ariy).  At 2 weeks she was 8lbs (basically her birth weight 7 lb 15 oz).  Ariy by this point was about 1lb past his birth weight at 9 lb 5 oz.  He was huge.  
• She is all girl - her legs, feet, fingers and toes are just long and slender and delicate.  We are hopeful she will be able to wear cute baby shoes.  
• She has just graduated out of newborn clothes, at least most of them.  She looks like she has grown mostly in length.
• Our favorite feature - that HAIR.  Sh still has a full head of hair.  It looks like it has a reddish tint but we are not for sure on that yet.

post bath hair-do

In other news, Rick and I have been in the process of trying to buy a house.  We put an offer on a short sale house in Newberg a few months ago.  Well, we just found out our offer is accepted and now we cross our fingers as we go through the financing and inspection phases.  We are excited about this possible next step for our family but there are still quite a few hurdles to get over to actually be at the move in point.  If you think of it, pray that things work out for this to be our new home.  That is what we are hoping and feeling at this point; that it is the next best step for us.  Update to come soon! We should know within 2 weeks if it is a go or not.

The play by play.

Yesterday was project "natural induction day."  I went in to have the "sweep" in the morning with the midwife.  Later that day I went for my second session of acupuncture.  I drank a few cups of red raspberry leaf tea and I spent some time walking the mall in the evening.  It all led to some pretty strong contractions later that evening but as usually once I go to bed they all pretty much go away.  The next few days we wait.  If Friday morning rolls around, we go in at 7:30am to have my water broken.  I am already at a 5 or so and ready to go says the midwife so this should go quick.

If you are actually following this saga, keep your eyes peeled on Rick's blog for the official announcement.  He will probably put one up fairly soon after we have her.  His blog can be found here.

A few random pics from this past Sunday.  Football Sunday of course.  I am experimenting with a new camera so not great shots quality but...

40 weeks today! This is the week...

I am pretty sure today will come and go without a baby but I have felt pretty prepared for this to happen.  I also have a lot to look forward to this week which definitely includes meeting our baby girl; either way there is an end to this part of the journey and I am looking forward to it.

So here is the update.  As of Friday I am pretty much a 4 dilated, 70-80% effaced and just ready to go.   I haven't experienced much change over the past couple weeks and my midwife believes I am just really close and ready to go and not much will change until active labor starts.

The plan is this - we try some more gentle natural ways to get things going.  I did my first acupuncture session yesterday.  It was actually pretty great.  In all I was there for 2 hours - way longer than I expected; I think I might of fallen asleep.  There are two spots on your hands and ankles that are suppose to help get things going and I believe release oxytocin in your body.  They put a few needles in other places but the sets in those particular spots, they hooked up to a little electrode thing that I could control and increase a current as I felt comfortable.  It was really interesting and I mostly just tried to relax and let it do it's thing.  I have felt a lot stronger contractions since and just a whole lot of pressure.  Sometimes this works the first time around but many people do a couple sessions but there are numerous studies from eastern and western countries to show that acupuncture is a very effective way to induce labor.  I may do another session tomorrow afternoon after my meeting with the midwife.

I also have been drinking  a lot of red raspberry leaf tea which is suppose to do something with the uterus.

Tomorrow morning I go in to have my membranes swept.  I really feel a tad uncomfortable saying that.  Again, for some this is enough to get things moving along.

The final and last resort will be going in on Friday to have my water broke as a means of inducing.  My body is already ready to go and this is how I was induced the first time so there is a strong likelihood that this should work.  The risk obviously is there is no turning back.  Once we break my water and must have her in some way shape or form.

Here are a couple pics of me at 40 weeks!  This has been a much different pregnancy and I think I look a lot different this time around.  I am so curious to see how big she is when we meet her this week.

39.5 weeks with Ariy

 

An update, some snow pics, and a few labor questions...

I am now 37.5 weeks and totally in the clear.  Our baby girl is looking healthy and can come at anytime.  I am currently at a 3 and 80% and ready to go says midwife.  It could be tonight or 3 weeks from now but either way, everyone is predicting a fast labor which I will take.  Our life has been a little crazy lately and I am sure one we are more "settled" we will give an official life update but for now I will say every major change that could happen is happening or going to happen.  It's crazy how everything seems to collide around the same time.  Rick has to travel tonight and will be gone for less than 24 hours and the big hope is that this little girl doesn't surprise us tonight while he is gone.  My midwife said I should try hard not to be up and walk too much just to be on the safe side because she doesn't think he would make it back in time.  Thanks again to everyone who has supported us lately and through this bed rest ordeal; we are thankful to be on the other side and officially be in the "waiting" game.

Yesterday morning it snowed here in Portland and Ariy loved playing in it.  Here are a few pics:

For those mommy's out there.  I have a couple questions.  I am hoping for a VBAC and was induced 5 days after Ariy's due day via breaking my water.  He needed to come out because my blood pressure was creeping up.  This time around, my biggest hope is simply to go into labor on my own.  I would love a successful VBAC but more than that I really don't want to end up being induced.  Did any of you do anything to get labor going?  What did you try?  Did you feel like anything actually worked?

36 Week Update

I always am a bit nervous when I write these.  I do know that people actually read them but I also just write so I have things documented somewhere.  I have often looked back at my pregnancy of Ariy via the blog.  I never know if I am writing too much info but I know that when I look back, I want to know as much as possible.  Anyway, that is my disclaimer for these updates.  They may be interesting to you or not at all.

First things first - we made it!  I hit 36 weeks yesterday and I am feeling very confident this baby has packed on some pounds recently and would do just fine if she entered the world.  Next Sunday, she will even be considered full term.  There is no stopping labor now if it were to happen.

Weight gain:  yes!  I didn't gain weight for a long time while on bed rest.  I sat at a stand still for close to 2 months which started to really worry me but no one else seemed to be concerned.  Well, the last month I have fully caught up.  I am pretty sure I have hit the 25 pound mark this week.

Blood pressure:  So far so good with this one.  I am pretty paranoid about this happening again and with Ariy it started going up sometime in the next week or so.  If this happens, there is a slight chance we will have to be induced and if I am far enough along we will try breaking my water like we did with Ariy.  Hopefully this does not happen though!

Overall feelings:  I feel pretty good.  Getting back on my feet has been slow.  I wanted to try and take it easy until 36 weeks and for the most part I did.  My body kind of forced me to slow down a few times.  I just get so sore from not being used to being up on my feet.

Dilation/Effacement:  As of a week ago I was 2cm, 50% effaced and -2 station if you know what any of that means.  Things are moving right along.  I am a lot further ahead then where I was with Ariy but that can also be normal for a second baby.

Meds:  I am done!!  woo hoo.  I'm so curious to see how this effects things this week.  When I started on the progesterone around 22 weeks I was having a lot of contractions - what I assumed were braxton hicks but since my cervix was shortening they could of actually been doing something.  The progesterone helps to relax your uterus so it doesn't contract so much.  It made a very big difference within days.  I have had more contractions the last couple weeks being up more but now that I am off it I wonder what will happen.

Am I ready?  The last day or so I have started to get excited to meet her and have her out.  I have also had a fair amount of anxiety about having two kiddos.  We are in tight quarters here and I am nervous to go through this adjustment in the midst of a lot of transition going on for us.  I know it will all work out just fine but I would say this time around I have a lot more nerves than I did with Ariy.

Name?  None yet.  We have some ideas and general ideas about naming her but no name specifically.  We will wait until she's born.

1 week left!!!!!!!!!!!

I will be 34 weeks next Sunday and that is my official "it's mostly safe to be off bedrest" day.  I will still rest a lot up until about 36 or 37 weeks but I feel pretty confident that I can sit upright more, get out once or twice, drive myself to the doctor and overall feel a little more "normal."

A little embarrassing (and a 32 week update).

The camera on my computer does not seem to have a timer on it so I tried really hard to take a few pics but it was a little difficult to press the button and pose at the same time so I caved and made a short video of myself.  so much fun.  I haven't recorded my growing belly at all this pregnancy partly because I look hideous most days, rarely shower and don't bother to put on a decent outfit because I am strapped to my bed.  Today was a doctors visit day which equals real clothes and a shower!

The Update:  I am 32 weeks and 2 days!

• Only 2 more weeks of bed rest!  At 34 weeks I am free to do as I wish.  The goal being that she stays in until at least 37 weeks though.  I plan on starting to be active but watching my body and resting when I can.  I will stay on my meds until 36 weeks.
• I am done seeing the specialist - the perinatologist which I can never spell or say right.  Starting in 2 weeks, I go see the midwives at the practice I go to.  There are 9 total and whoever is on call when I go to the hospital will be the one to deliver the baby.
• I am still planning a VBAC at this point.  I can only go a week past my due date and ideally I go into labor on my own.  There is a chance if I am late (which would be crazy after all of this) that I would just have my water broken to get things going.  
• My weight jumped up a bit this week which is not surprising and maybe good.   For whatever reason, my weight has not changed dramatically since being on bed rest.  I have had a few days in the past couple weeks where I feel hungry ever hour or so so I am not surprised a gained a bit.
• Baby looks good and is head down now.  I think she is probably there to stay.  She is super active and her jabs have even been painful a few times.  
• I feel so shallow but the FIRST thing I want to do when I am off of bed rest is drive!, maybe get starbucks and go to a store; maybe Target or a kids consignment store.  I just can't wait to be out.
• The SECOND thing I want to do is take out our Christmas decorations and go with the fam to Portland Zoo Lights which I have been looking forward to going to for 5 years!  I am still a bit disappointed that the animals are not dressed in lights but I think it will still be a good time.

Made it to 30 weeks!

Yesterday I turned 30 weeks which is exciting.  It feels like the home stretch at this point.  It's a bit of a weird place for us to be right now because realistically my body is showing signs of labor so the baby could very well be here in 6 or 7 weeks which feels like no time or it could be another 2.5 months as our due date is January, 6th.  It is just a guessing game.

The official update:  I am finished with having ultrasounds to check my cervical length.  At this point, it is normal for any pregnant woman to have a cervix that slowly shortens so checking for just length is not as important. I had my second to last perinatal visit today.  I will see the perinatologist at 32 weeks and then at 34 weeks I go back to exclusively seeing the midwives as they will be who will deliver the baby.  Most everything looked good today.  I am dilated to a 1 at this point which means I need to stop bedrest cheating.  I may or may not of been getting up more recently and picking Ariy up.

I have four more weeks of bedrest.  I am so anxious and excited to reach that marker.  I have actually been feeling a bit better lately which makes bedrest that much more difficult.  I have to stop cheating for another few weeks to ensure that she doesn't come before 34 weeks but the doctor is more than confident I will make it that far.

I also had to go through VBAC counseling with the perinatologist.  They just explain the requirements to be able to be a candidate, the liklihood of success, the process and risks.  I am a very good candidate based on my labor and surgery with Ariy but the fact that Ariy never descended during pushing does lessen the likelihood of success.  What would improve it would be to have a smaller baby.  Ariy was 8lb 8oz so a bit on the larger size :)  In the end, the doctor said this could work out to my advantage.  She said the ideal week would be 37 weeks because she would be full term, most likely have no NICU time, normal hospital stay time and a smaller baby!  So for now, that is the prayer that I go into labor a bit earlier.  A pre-christmas baby.  But really, who knows.  Some women in my shoes will go full term and even late, it is just a major guessing game.  If I do go past my due date and don't go into labor on my own, there is a chance I could just have my water broken like I did with Ariy or I would have an elective repeat c-section.

Ariy is really into dragging around the largest and heaviest item he possibly can.  This day it was luggage. 

He loves to drive in the grocery store cars when he goes shopping with Grandma.

His "buddies" or giraffes go everywhere with him these days.  He sleeps with them, snuggles with them, feeds them, gives them drinks and even blows his nose on them.  True  love.

Practicing for baby sister.

Drinking healthy smoothies with Grandma.  Loves it!

Half way there!

Today I am 28 weeks and I have been on bedrest for just over 6 week with 6 weeks left to go!  I am very excited to be at this point and have less weeks in front of me.  I think it will help make time go by faster.  To celebrate I thought I would share all the things I have and have NOT done in the last 6 weeks of my bedrest life.

This may be a little too much information for some.

• I have not gone to a store in 6 weeks.  No grocery shopping or anything.
• I have not cooked a real meal - heating up food doesn't really count.
• I have worn the same 5 items of clothing.  They have been washed a few times along the way.
• I have showered maybe 6 or 7 times.  I apologize - this is probably the grossest.
• I have lost all muscle mass.
• I sadly have only finished one book and am still in the middle of 2.  You would think I would be more productive but not so much.
• I have had 5 doctors appointments and 4 ultrasounds.
• I have not drive a car in 6 weeks.
• I have had dessert more than I ever have in my life.  I feel a little guilty about this one.
• I have watched almost 4 seasons of a highly popular but controversial show.  I might be too embarrassed to share the name.
• I have received one awesome care package, 4 hand delivered chais or lattes, 5 homemade meals and 7 awesome visitors. 

28 Week Update

Today I am 27 weeks and 5 days.  I will be 28 weeks on Sunday.  Meeting this goal is exciting because 90% of babies born at 28 weeks or close after will survive and 90% will survive AND be healthy.  The next big goal is 34 weeks when it jumps up to 99%.  At that point, they will not try and stop labor if I were to go into pre-term labor but we are all hopeful and very optimistic that I will make it to 34 weeks.

This was the first appointment where my cervix actually stayed the same. It was not any shorter and even creeped back up to a 2 (two weeks ago the highest was a 1.8 I believe) at times during the measurement process.  I have also really started to gauge my threshold for getting up and moving around and know when it is effecting my cervix and uterus.   My threshold is basically doing nothing - nothing at all including meals.  I have gone down to just going to the bathroom; the basics.  It seems to be working so we will keep at it for another 6 weeks.

Currently I am doing my "normal" appointments with my midwife as well as seeing the perinatologist.  I generally have an appointment every week between the two but sometimes I will randomly have a week off.  I will most likely see the peri 3 more times until I reach 34 weeks and then my care goes completely back to the midwives until we have the baby since after 34 weeks they will be the ones to deliver in the hospital with me (as opposed to the peri). 

I also get to stop with all the ultrasounds - woo hoo!  I have actually really enjoyed watching her growth and having so many pictures of her (see below) before she is even out of the womb but it also makes for long appointments (about 2 hours) and too much stimulus around a sensitive cervix is not awesome from this point forward.  

I am really torn about how I feel about time right now.   I really want it to go by quickly so I can be off bed rest and checking things off my pre-baby to-do list but I also don't think I am quite ready to jump into having 2 babies and potentially that is what will happen.  I get off bed rest and a week or two later I have 2 babies.  That just sounds a little overwhelming.

Here is the latest picture of our baby girl. 

26 week update

Last week I had my regular midwife appointment and today I had my ultrasound and perinatology appointment.  These appointments are fun and stressful all at the same time.  I love seeing our baby girl at all of these ultrasounds.  I never had ultrasounds past 20 weeks with Ariy so its fun to be able to see her grow and start to look like a real baby.  At the same time, the perinatologist who is basically a high risk OB, works exclusively with women who have high risk or potentially high risk pregnancies.  This can really range but I know some women go there and get really bad news.  Today as I was waiting for my ride to pick me up, a young mom, I am guessing around 26 weeks as well came out crying.  I didn't hear much of her conversation other than that she was being sent over to the hospital.  It can just be stressful.  I am thankful that so far me and baby look really good (minus the whole cervix issue - update below).

How many weeks pregnant: 26 weeks on Sunday

Weight gain:  7 - 10 lbs.  The weird yet depressing phenomenon has been my weight going down or staying the same since being on bed rest.  All this really means is I am losing muscle which makes me sad.

Cravings: I don't know if this counts because I do have a strong affinity for all things fall but I have been very excited lately about anything pumpkin including cookies, lattes, cake, bagels, etc.

Food aversions:  Still not feeling mexican food.  

Boy or girl:  Baby girl!!  She currently weighs 1 lb 11 oz and is in the 40% for weight at this gestation.  I didn't even know those charts existed for this age (before birth).

Wearing maternity clothes:  oh yeah.  I actually put all my maternity clothes in one of my dresser drawers and I live out of that one drawer.  Honestly, I rarely change my clothes unless I get to go on a big outing like to the doctors!!

Overall thoughts/Updates: I found out today that my cervix is still shortening (effacing).  It was as low as a 1.5cm during the ultrasound.  I went in knowing this would be the case.  My body is very sensitive and getting up and down too much triggers a lot of pre-term labor symptoms which equals Not Good.  Yesterday I just did too much and I knew it; while in process of doing too much I knew it.  You may be thinking, well "why do you get up then?"  I don't know.  All I know is this has been very difficult for me. I know I am stubborn and I realize I am putting this baby at risk but for whatever reason I have a hard time stopping myself and letting anyone else stop me (except for Rick usually). This is probably one of the hardest things I have had to deal with for some time  and I know in the long run I will look back and say that really wasn't that bad.  I don't know why exactly it is so hard for me but emotionally I am like a major rollercoaster right now.  

I am still feeling good about where we are going but prayer is definitely a welcome activity.  The next two weeks I am in bed, no getting out except to pee and poop pretty much.  My short term goal is 28 weeks so I just need to chill out and hand over control until then.  Ariy will be ok, my marriage will be ok, this baby will be ok.  Once we hit 28 weeks the likelihood of her survival goes way up and we can breath just a little more.  

Thank you all who have prayed and just supported us during this time.  I have needed every phone call, text, visitor, mail, nail polish, books and encouragement that I have been given.  Thank you!!!  

Quit complaining.

Things I hate:

• Feeling like I am complaining constantly
• Having to ask for help
• Forcing attention on me

But this is how I feel ALL THE TIME right now.  I don't know what it is about laying around all the time and not being able to fill my normal roles but man, this is hard.  Way harder than I expected.  I am still hopeful and optimistic this is all going to get way easier but I am really struggling to cope at this point.

I am also pregnant which means I am extra emotional.  I am also taking a hormone nightly which can add to general mood swings.  This just doesn't help.  I have a feeling I will come back to these thank you lists because everyday I run through it in my head over and over again so I can stay relatively positive and sane.

So for today...things I am Thankful for lately:

• Family, friends and church that are making this all doable without having to hire anyone to help with Ariy and other needs.
• Ariy being so resilient and happy.  It's hard to do this having him but I can't imagine doing it without him.  He always makes me happy and I enjoy are cuddle times and tickle times (in bed).
• Lissa coming to visit.  I had my first real visitor this week and it was AWESOME.  She was so helpful and sooo generous bringing 2 meals AND playing and loving on Ariy.  I think Ariy loved having a friend to play with so thank you Charlotte (Lissa's daughter).
• Dot being more than fine with my needy-won't-you-come-over texts.
• Friends from the east coast calling, texting and fbing.  I miss them all so much right now.
• The ability to use this time for things like journaling, prayer and reading scripture.  All things that have struggled to remain daily habits in my life.
• Baby girl doing great and so active.

One of the harder days this week was Ariy having a cold that irritated his airway so much he woke up from a nap struggling to breath.  I freaked out.  He has an inhaler but I haven't used it for almost 6 months and couldn't remember how much to give him or when or anything.  The whole episode was really difficult for me as it obviously scared me to see him like that but also to feel helpless.  I am not allowed to be the mom I want to be for him right now.  I hate that.  

There is so much going on right now in so many families.  I know of a lot of heartache and sickness and am reminded that currently I have two very healthy babies and great community.  I seriously have nothing to complain about but despite this I somehow keep jumping in and out of this dark hole.  

I am sure I will look back at this and think oh no big deal Christine.  Come on.  It was all worth it, right?

Update

I had another ultrasound this past Wednesday and things look relatively the same.  My cervix has shortened by .2 mm so I am at a 2.0 right now (I was at a 2.2 the week before).  The rate at which it was shortening went way down so the doctors think this is working.  I should expect to do this until 34 weeks depending upon how the baby looks at that point.  That puts us at early December.

2nd trimester and a new home

As of July 1st, we became Portland dwellers. We are sharing a home with my close relative Dodgie. He is basically like another grandfather to Ariy so Ariy has LOVED being able to see him every day. Our hope is that in about a year or maybe less, we can save up and be ready to buy a home. We are very thankful that Dodgie has graciously opened our house to our busy family and support us in our goals.

As for baby #2, we are getting excited but I think it is still surreal. I am about 15 weeks along and am thankful to be in the second trimester. I have to be thankful because all in all I have had a very easy pregnancy but I am happy to see a few weird symptoms slowly go away. Again, I have had lots and lots of saliva. Soooo gross and caused me to chew gum like it was my job. That has mostly stopped. Lots of food aversions. With ariy I ate eggs every day and meat and protein was no problem. It was until this week that I took the leap and successfully made some eggs and ate them. I also ate chicken this week. Mostly, I have wanted bread and French friends. Pretty much the healthiest diet you can imagine.

I am happy that despite the not so good diet, I am healthy. I have been able to stay pretty active. I've gained a total of 5 lbs in the last three months and my belly is definitely starting to look like a prego belly. My blood pressure is great so far which was the issue at the end of my pregnancy with Ariy. At this point, things look great. One thing that has been very uplifting about this pregnancy is my care. I was able to see a midwife with my last pregnancy and I was able to labor that way I wished and besides having a csection, I enjoyed my labor and delivery experience. However, having a fresh perspective and new midwife has shown me that it can even be better. I have had a lot to process given the stress of my last pregnancy and start the decision making process of how I hope to see this pregnancy go. I am so thankful to be with a midwife and practice that really supports me and who believes first and foremost, how things play out and the decisions we make is always my decision in the end. I think last time, there was a lot of fear and pressure and although those things may come into play, I believe that this time, they will remind me of my octopus and the ability to say no. Even with my care at this point, there is no pressure to come in every 2 to 4 weeks right now. I am very healthy and I can wait until the next needed appointment which is around 20 weeks. It's nice to be able to stretch things out and feel confident that I am doing good thus far. Our next appointment is August 23rd and it is also when we can find out the gender. I plan on having them write it down and finding out later. I want to do something easy but creative...if you have any suggestions let me know.

Finally, Ariy is getting more and more of a personality every day. We now live with a cat and somehow Ariy decided that when you ask "what does a cat say"? He responds with not a sound but by scrunching his nose. I just think it is so funny. Not a great video but you get the idea. In the video he is standing at the top of the stairs looking down to where the kitty lives.

 

 

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Life Updates

As many of you know, we have been in a constant state of transition around here.  I'm thankful that my husband and I could both be described as flexible and laid back.  If this wasn't a normal trait for either of us, I think the last 6 months would of been a lot harder than they have been.


Jobs
I moved to a 10 hour a week part time position in my office in January of this year.  This was a big move from working full-time for the last four years in the same office.  May 1st of this year marked my official last day of my part time position.  It was a sad day and honestly, I mostly just felt like I was going on vacation and I would be back.  God had other plans though as I think my stay at home status is going to stick for sometime now.  Rick has been working 2 jobs consistently since February.  He was employed by our local First Student as a sub bus driver for our school district which meant crazy and random hours and early mornings.  Rick has also been working part time at a church since September and recently he started another part time position in which he gets to use his writing skills at a Hillsboro-based company called MyBinding.com.  Since the bus driving just ended Rick is now working the two part time position which makes for a much simpler schedule.  


House and home
We are sad at the decision to move but feel like this is a great opportunity for us.  We are moving to Portland at the end of this month.  We have LOVED Newberg and hope to possibly end up here again in another year but for now we have decided to live with family for a short period of time to try and save up money fast.  We have been on a quest to buy a house and have encountered a few roadblocks and realized it would be another 6 -12 months before we could buy so we are using that time to save save save.  We are extremely thankful to Dodgie who is so graciously taking in a family of 3/almost 4.


Ariy
Ariy is a full on toddler now as he is walking and starting to talk and show more emotions.  We recently got back from a 2 week vacation to visit college friends out east.  Ariy did so well and we had so much fun with old friends and meeting their kiddos.  Ariy has definitely been in a slight depression since returning home and having to go back to playing with just Mommy and Daddy.  As for becoming a big brother, I think he is excited but time will tell.


Baby #2
On Thursday I had my first prenatal appointment which was a bit later than when I went with Ariy.  I am at least 10.5 weeks along if now further.  My midwife did a little wand thing on my belly to see if we could hear a heartbeat but she said at 10 weeks we really shouldn't.  Well that baby was up higher than expected and we heard a heartbeat loud and clear.  Since the dating is not exact, I will have a dating ultrasound this Wednesday which I think is a pretty great Birthday present.  I think we were all a little in shock when I realized I was prego but at this point, we are all excited (and hoping for a girl).  

Ariy's got an announcement

 

My super spiritual son

Ariy is 9 days away from being 1 years old however, he has already celebrated 2 Easters. Last year we were able come leave the hospital on Saturday afternoon, the day before Easter. I have very fond memories of our time celebrating last year. We had close family over and celebrated by holding a just days old baby. This year, we were able to attend church and have the same family over to celebrate once again. This time Ariy was moving around, enjoying his fans that have been such an important part of his life this past year.

I am really enjoying this phase of life right now. I am enjoying how much Ariy is a sponge and is learning so much every day. I am enjoying my job and new role at work simply allowing me to be support. I am thankful for a new bible study that is growing me one daily basis and thankful for a friend who is just as excited about it as I am. I am optimistic and dreaming big about Lara and my recent business venture. I often feel like Easter comes and goes and despite all my best intentions to meditate and be thankful for the freedom and life Jesus has allowed us to live, I somehow just let it pass by with one short prayer. This year I feel a bit different. I feel like I am starting to understand (again maybe) how to live life to the fullest and Easter was an amazing reminder of who to be thankful for for that gift. There is freedom in Christ.

 

11 months and finally mobile

This last month has been a bit of a whirlwind. We attempted to travel back to Massachusetts and as much as I hoped it to be a grand and full trip it was one of the hardest times we have had. Ariy either suffered from bad anxiety or he caught a virus on the plane ride out. The next day he had his first fever and never really recovered. He was not himself for a good 5 days...lots of tears and a constant need to have mommy right by his side at all times. This meant no sleep for mommy for a good week. He was happy to see daddy when Rick got out but by that time we had caught a cold and all three of us were sick. Needless to say we are glad to be back in Oregon and hope our next trip is a little ore productive. I was very sad that I only saw a very small handful of people and hope Ariy can meet more friends and family next time (or maybe when they come out here).

While we were away ariy seemed to be right on the cusp of learning handful of new things. Since coming home everyday he masters a new skill. It has been a lot of fun to interact and figure out all that he understands.

• Waves hi and bye to people. He is still very social and loves people and kids and dogs.
• Has said words like mama, dada, baba, etc.
• Bounces when you ask what a Kangaroo does.
• Opens his mouth and does his version of a roar when you ask what a lion does.
• Crawls! Finally. He also can get around pretty well nice he is standing and holding onto something.
• He is a climber.
• He has signed his first word.... Can you guess? FOOD
• He knows what bath, nap time, diaper, outside and no means.

He generally is a pretty happy guy who loves to be busy, explore the whole house, go outside, smile and wave at people, and play guitar...yes, he loves guitar.

Like every mom says, I can't believe I will have a one year old next month. Wow!